The Best of Student Films, Volume 1 (.txt version)

[Video: FBI Copyright warning]
[Audio: generic 1980s-era elevator music]
[Video: title reads “The Best of Student Films, Volume 1”; background of eighties neon grid-styled landscape]
Announcer: Coming soon to home video, it’s The Best of Student Films, Volume One. On this cassette, we bring you a collection of never-before-seen gems for classroom viewing. From Super 8 to VHS, these student productions from over the past several decades are sure to inspire your English class to make their own cinematic masterpieces. So let’s take a look at what’s inside.

[Video: Image of Rated G trailer screen]
[Audio: somber piano music throughout segment]
[Video: text on screen reads “Produced by Kirkwood High School AP English, Kirkwood Missouri—1971”]
[Video: clip of hermit crabs on beach]
Voiceover: I should have been a pair of ragged claws. Scuttling across the floors of silent seas.
[Video: clip of yellow cat stretching on yellow backlit window ledge]
Voiceover: The yellow fog that rubs its back upon the window-panes. The yellow smoke that rubs its muzzle on the window-panes.
[Video: clip of bare feet walking on beach and leaving footprints]
Voiceover: I grow old . . . I grow old . . . I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.
[Video: title reads “Prufrock / Based on the Classic Poem by T.S. Elliot”]

[Video: image of Rated R trailer screen]
[Audio: classic rock music]
[Video: Title screen reads “What’s Happening at Rocky High”]
Voiceover: Here at Rocky High, there’s so much going on behind the scenes—let’s take a peek.
[Video: clip of marching band practicing; text on screen reads “Band Shenanigans”]
[Audio: up tempo band music]
[Video: clip of football players practicing; text on screen reads “A Football Stadium in Shambles”]
[Audio: classic striptease soundtrack]
[Video: clip featuring arms of women wearing white uniforms dishing out mashed potatoes onto plates in cafeteria; text on screen reads “Lustful Lunch Ladies!”]
[Audio: somber piano music]
[Video: clip depicts spinning game wheel landing between two supposedly divergent life paths, “get stoned” and “win scholarship”; text on screen reads “Learning the Dangers of Dope”]
[Video: clip of hippie teens conversing and looking too happy]
[Audio: triumphant film score]
[Video: clip of several men running towards table, who then sit and begin to eat pies vigorously; text on screen reads “Varsity Pie-Eating Team”]
[Video: clip of band practicing; text on screen reads “Stories Galore”]
Voiceover: Rocky High Class of 76 rules!

[Video: image of Rated G trailer screen]
[Video: text on screen reads “An Opportunity Scholars Production: University of South Carolina”]
Voiceover: Growing up in the South it ain’t exactly easy, but I’ll tell you what, I wouldn’t want to live any other place . . .
[Audio: Classic Appalachian Folk Song]
[Video: several shots of landscape of rural South; transition to text on screen reading “Winner 1976 Documentary Film Festival”]
[Video: shot of horse-drawn plow fades into shot of mechanical tractor; cut to clips of children and farm animals]
[Video: Title screen reads “Southern Stories: A Documentary Series”]
[Video: text on screen reads “Never-Before-Seen-Interviews”; clip of older Gullah woman speaking, followed by older white woman speaking]
[Video: text on screen reads “Historical Roots”; shots of white people weaving, playing fiddles, and square dancing] [Video: text on screen reads “Original Performances”; clip of younger Black woman performing a solo modern dance.]
[Video: clip of a young multicultural choir singing in unison; Text on screen reads “Teaching the World to Sing . . . / . . . In Perfect Harmony”]
[Video: Text on screen reads “Coming Soon”]

[Video: image of Rated G trailer screen]
[Audio: Eighties synthesizer music plays throughout segment]
[Video: hand-drawn animation of orange rocket with young male orange astronaut inside; the rocket flies onto screen and the astronaut floats outside; a comic bubble reads “I have to save the universe!”]
[Video: hand-drawn animation of blue rocket with young male blue astronaut inside; the rocket flies onto screen and the astronaut floats outside; a comic bubble reds “No, I have to save the universe!”]
[Video: blue and orange astronauts appear on screen together; comic bubble reds “Why don’t we save it . . . together!!!”]
[Video: title screen reads “Cosmic Kids”; followed by text on screen reading “Sacred Heart High School. Nominated for a Judy Award (1984)”]

[Audio: generic 1980s-era elevator music]
[Video: title reads “The Best of Student Films, Volume 1”; background of eighties neon grid-styled landscape]
Announcer: You’ll find all this and more on The Best of Student Films, Volume One. Here’s what some prominent educators have been saying about this collection.
[Video: text on screen reads “‘The Benefits of this project lie in the fact that each student thought originally, creatively, and clearly’ (125)—Jeanette Hanke”]
[Video: text on screen reads “‘Film has the power to make us feel. But in addition film study generates language and literature learning of a high order which to me is its own justification in the English Class.’ (50)—Carole Cox”]
Announcer: That’s The Best of Student Films, Volume One. Order yourself a copy today.
[Video: text on screen reads “Order Now 1-800-867-5309 CC 100 Years Productions”]

Media assets used in this production listed in Production Notes.